Trust yourself and embrace your intuition

Having a high school sweetheart is a controversial topic. Some people think it’s so sweet that we’ve been together so long while others think we’re crazy for getting together at such a young age. Everyone seems to have an opinion on whether you will stay together or break up. I get unsolicited relationship advice from almost anyone I talk to. 

So, you could imagine the type of responses I would get when I would tell people we were going to the same college. And then when I would say we were planning on living together. I had not only close friends and family tell me it was a bad idea, but teachers in my school would tell me we would never last. I’m not sure what it is about having a serious relationship in high school that freaks people out so much. Maybe it’s different for me because my grandparents are high school sweethearts and are still married today.

Dylan and I started dating in 2017 which was our freshman year of high school. Starting our relationship at such a young age allowed us to grow together as a couple. I think this was a big reason we felt confident enough to go to the same college together.

Even with all the negative comments Dylan and I still saw no problem with us coming to Bloomsburg together, and I am so glad we made that decision. From the day I moved in freshman year to the day I graduate, he will always be there for me. It always comforted me to know I had at least one person in Bloom I could go to. Especially when I struggled to find really close friends in the beginning.

Once Dylan and I started dating in high school I would myself become more comfortable being with just him which caused me to not find new friends. By the time we graduated high school, I realized that I only had Dylan plus one or two friends. When I went to college, I was determined to not let this be the case again. Although I still loved spending time with Dylan, I had to be sure I tried to meet new friends.

When we returned for our sophomore year neither one of us knew who to room with. We figured we could do random housing if we lived on campus, but that was nerve-racking. Finally, we had the idea we could get an off-campus apartment together. It was definitely a risky decision that everyone also had an opinion on, but we felt confident. So many people would say “What happens if you break up”, but why would I plan on us breaking up? It just seemed silly to me to not do what I wanted because we may or may not break up.

I feel like this decision really shaped my college experience. Not only did it bring us closer together, but it helped us form a very tight-knit friend group. My friends became his friends and vice versa. We all became one big friend group instead of two divided. Embrace the opportunity to make new connections whether that be from your significant other’s friends or open to introducing two different friend groups. It is something I will struggle with not having after I graduate. When we leave Bloomsburg, we already know we will have to live with our parents for a little while to save up money. Who knows how soon out of college we will get a job or if we will be making enough to get an apartment together. We want to wait to move out till when we feel financially comfortable enough to. It is going to be so hard not being together as much. But I still have a few more months of us living in the same apartment and having the same schedule.

I’m going to make sure I prioritize spending time with him and our friends. We have the best time making dinner together whether that be with my best friend Morgan or by ourselves. We love having movie nights, game nights, going on road trips to Sixers games, and just doing the small things together like grocery shopping or getting lunch at Chick-fil-A. But the one thing I will truly miss the most after college is the amount of free time we have to spend together. When we have a 9-5, we might be able to make dinner together or do things on the weekend, but it won’t be the same as the college schedule. Now we only have to be in class for about 3 hours every day then we can do whatever we want. It just makes me want to savor all the time we have now and not take anything for granted. Especially soaking in our trip to Jamaica for spring break. This will be our first big trip together as a couple so I am excited to see the way it will strengthen our relationship.

I love Dylan so much and I am forever grateful I didn’t listen to everyone’s negative comments in high school. Going to college together was the best decision we could have made. When I think back on Bloomsburg or my college experience the first thing I will remember is how he was there for me every step of the way.

The biggest lesson I have learned through this is to trust myself. I chose to embrace my intuition when it came to deciding if Dylan and I would go to the same school together or live together in college. Seeing that these decisions actually worked out and made my college experience better proved to me that I can make good decisions and that I can trust myself. I knew going to the same school and living together was the best choice for us, but everyone I talked to had me questioning my own feelings. Learning to trust myself and stop second-guessing my intuition is the best takeaway I could have gotten from college.

— Monica Wilt, a senior communication studies major at Commonwealth University-Bloomsburg with an emphasis on organizational communication, is interning with the Office of Marketing and Communications this spring. She is a native of New Cumberland, who loves Taylor Swift, the Philadelphia 76ers, and the show Survivor.

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